92 days, 2208, 132480 minutes until Halloween.
Ok, it is time to get it right you posers. Today I saw a dead leaf on the sidewalk and I knew the time would soon be upon us again, Hallo-fucking-ween. And I swear on all that is holy that if I see one more group of people in [...]

I recently discovered that girls actually poo. Before this revelation, I was led to believe that the only things that came out of a girl’s ass were diamonds and lollipops. I could not have been more wrong. Don’t think that I’m not on to you, ladies. Every time you excuse yourself from the dinner table [...]

I must preface this post by stating that I absolutely love hipster girls, this love however is strictly superficial, something about leggings and badangly shit draped over their lean necks gives me the fuzzies. That being said, I loathe this culture like Dubya loathes that eyesore of a mosque near his ranch in Texas. Everything [...]